A Balanced Perspective

I've really been trying to get a balanced perspective on the whole homeschooling issue.  I found what I was looking for today as I read the comments on a blog post.  In the column from the NY Times, a mother was writing about her desire to spend more time (positively) interacting with her son.  This desire had led to her decision to homeschool.  I could see where she was coming from and share some of her motivation.  I know too many kids who get up, rush to school, rush home to do homework, rush to music lessons or soccer practice or scouts and go to bed without ever spending any real time with their parents.  They are lucky if they get any time to play or even eat a real meal at a table.  This is certainly not the kind of lifestyle I want for my kids.  Of course, there will be schedules to follow and places to go at specific times.  But I really want peace for them. Peace and rest and play and fun.

I decided to read through the comment section.  I found the usual string of criticism that I was ready for - things like socialization, learning to follow a schedule, respect for authority figures, credentials - things that I have read enough about to understand that they really aren't issues for homeschooled kids.  What did catch my attention were the comments about apron strings.

The mom in the post talked a lot about the things she wanted from her relationship with her son.  The concern raised was that she was really just scared to let her son grow up.  I'm not ready to condemn the writer with this motivation.  The truth is: too much hurry is not good for anyone and it's incredibly important that kids have strong relationships with their parents.  Her decision to homeschool doesn't necessarily mean she wants to thwart her son's independence and force his regression to babyhood.

Still, I think this consideration is an important one.  It will be important, no matter what form of education we select, to make sure we foster close, trusting relationships with our boys while encouraging their independence.  After all, that is the goal of parenting - helping our little ones grow into responsible, loving adults.