As I mentioned in an earlier post, we recently got together with a friend who was homeschooled. She is the oldest of (I believe) six homeschooled children in her family. I was very eager for her input and am so glad we went to talk with her. I want to share some of our questions and her responses as well as some of my feelings about the topic. (Note: I didn't quote M verbatim, I'm writing this blog based on my memory of our conversation and the notes I took. Sorry, M if I got something wrong.)
1. What was your schedule like (daily and yearly)?
M's answer: They started each day with devotions then jumped into academics in the morning. The kids usually spent the afternoons pursuing their own interests and hobbies (music, crafts, etc.) They took a break in the summer.
My thoughts: The schedule is one of the things that most amazes me about homeschooling. Jeff and I have long been concerned about how full kids days are and how little time there seems to be to pursue their own interests and develop their unique talents. Kids today are really stressed. They've got a million things going on and tons of balls to juggle and homework to pile on top of it all. But it seems that homeschoolers have lots of time to explore the world. I keep reading over and over again that it usually only takes a few hours for homeschoolers to accomplish what it takes schools 7 hours to teach. It seems crazy, but I guess it makes sense. Homeschoolers have fewer interruptions. They work at their own pace, which means they can take extra time on lessons that are more difficult for them and don't have to spend as much time on lessons that they pick up quickly. They have a very small student-to-teacher ratio, which means they don't have to wait long for the teacher to answer their questions. The idea of having time to just be kids is one of the things that most draws me to homeschooling. (And that time of "just being kids" is often full of learning!)
2. How did having multiple students of different ages work in your family?
M's answer: It wasn't a problem and as the kids got older (around 13) they began teaching themselves.
My thoughts: I have read in many places that homeschool kids quickly become self-starters who take charge of their own education. Wouldn't it be wonderful if I didn't have to goad my kids to learn, but they would willingly seek learning? Also, given the way homeschooling schedules seem to run, it seems like there would be plenty of time to spend one on one time with each kid. Plus, I would get built-in one on one time with each kid! :)
3. What are the laws regarding homeschooling in Illinois?
Have you ever had any problems?
M's answer: In Illinois homeschools are considered private schools. You do not have to register or notify the school district that you are homeschooling. Their family has never had any issues with their school district or truancy officers.
My thoughts: This is probably the aspect of homeschooling that most freaks me out. I'm not a big fan of confrontation and am concerned about missing some step of the process and getting in trouble. I also ran across a local website that talked about what to do if a truancy officer comes to your door and how you should immediately go to the doctor if a truancy officer comes and get your children checked out so that no one can claim abuse. That all sounds pretty intimidating to me. Still, the fact is that homeschooling is perfectly legal and Illinois is actually one of the best states to homeschool in. (A shocker, right? Illinois not being overly controlling?)
4. What did you love about being homeschooled?
M's answer: She particularly liked the way it affected her family - the closeness of their relationships and getting to spend lots of time together. She also loved that she had time and freedom to learn about things that interested her.
My thoughts: The things M loves about homeschooling are a couple of big draws for me as well. It's so important for kids to have good relationships with their parents, but it keeps getting harder and harder for parents to even get face time with their kids.
5. What about record keeping, especially if there would be an eventual need to return to school or go to college?
M's answer: Keep records of coursework. Her parents made transcripts and had a diploma printed for her. They took the California Achievement Tests annually.
My thoughts: This question actually generated a lot of conversation - especially among the hubbies who were reluctant participants in the conversation to begin with. It was confusing to those of us with little experience with homeschooling how a family could print up a document and an official organization would just accept it. No matter how many times we said, "yeah, but..." the answer was just that they do. Those institutions can see the quality of the student's work. Also, homeschool students tend to excel in higher education and colleges have begun specifically recruiting homeschoolers. And the paper work is official. It is coming from a private school that has every authority to issue diplomas and transcripts. I have read in a few places that it can be helpful to name your homeschool. You can even get educators discounts at a lot of places.
6. What was your style of homeschooling?
What curriculum did you use?
M's answer: They used Abeka, Saxon, etc. Her mother suggested she tell me not to go nuts about curriculum in the beginning - just enjoy our time learning together. She also mentioned finding materials that fit each of our educational styles.
My thoughts: Curriculum excites me. There are lots of different approaches to homeschooling. From the research I've done, I think I would be an eclectic homeschooler - taking bits and pieces from different approaches. I've always liked certain aspects of Montessori education, I have a high interest in delight-led learning, I like the work/service/study aspect of the Moore formula, I know I need a little structure to keep me organized. However, I wouldn't want to adopt any of those programs as a rule for our homeschool. Mostly, like M said, I think it will be about continuing to pay attention to how each of us learns and choosing materials and activities that suit our needs. How awesome is it that we would have the freedom to choose what is best for us?
7. How did it affect your family life? What was it like to be together so much? How did you create space?
M's answer: They are all very close. She said she thinks forced togetherness is not necessarily a bad thing - they had to work out their problems and go on.
My thoughts: I like that homeschooling would allow us to have time as a family without having to strictly regulate how many activities kids could participate in. Who knows how our relationship will look at the end of our kids school years? But I would hope that by spending time together each day we would remain close. It seems that most homeschool families I read about are very close-knit. I do know that it would be important for me to get some time away from time to time and to provide places in our home for being quiet and alone.
8. One of the questions/concerns most frequently raised about homeschooling is socialization. What are your thoughts on homeschooling and socialization/making friends?
M's answer: Homeschooling is actually better preparation for real world socialization that institutional schools. In an institutional school you spend the majority of your time at a desk listening or working on papers. You have little time to talk to others. The socialization that does occur is age restricted. In homeschooling, your interact naturally with people of all ages, races, etc. as you go about the business of life. Her family was involved in a homeschool co-op that met together frequently doing things like visiting nursing homes, going ice-skating, etc. Her family was also involved in 4H
My thoughts: Socialization was the big question for me in the beginning. The more I've read, the more I found that socialization just isn't an issue for homeschoolers. The kids participate in all kinds of activities - generally more than a school kid would be able to (no homework to hold them back!). They play sports and participate in 4H and play at playgrounds - all the time making friends with kids their age. They visit nursing homes, are often active in their churches, take numerous field trips and have more time to visit relatives - all the time making friends with people older and younger than them. They get lots of real-world experience - running errands and helping take care of their home and family. I've read in several places that blind studies have been conducted where homeschooled students routinely are accessed as more socially adept than their institutional school compatriots. I've heard it said that in homeschooling the world is your classroom. If that's true, then how natural is it that homeschoolers have no problem with learning how to operate in the world (socialization)?
9. What was the role of your father in homeschooling?
M's answer: He led morning devotions each morning over breakfast before he left for work. He supported the school and his family. He helped with subjects that he was particularly adept at.
My thoughts: This is important to me. While I know the primary work of actually teaching the children would be my own, this is in no way "my thing". If we decide to homeschool, both of us have to make the decision and I know we will each have a role to play. A lot of the science stuff I just imagine naturally falling to Jeff as he invites the boys to the garage to help him with whatever interesting little experiment he's working on - you know he's already out there melting stuff anyway! I imagine the boys getting hands-on learning time with dad as they help him build a fort in the backyard and catch turtles on the side of the road.
10. How do you teach subjects that you aren't an expert in?
M's answer: There are lots of options - there are curricula that walk you through lessons, you can relearn/learn the material yourself, you can trade lessons with someone else (i.e. trading music lessons for yard work, etc.) As kids get older you can often teach themselves or take certain classes at the high school or community colleges. Co-ops also very often offer classes.
My thoughts: Another attractive aspect of homeschooling - the focus seems to shift from teacher to student to become more about learning together. After all, education is less about retaining information than it is about learning how to find answers to questions and think critically about what you are learning. I like the idea of studying alongside my boys. Sure, I'll prepare lessons. But I bet I'll enjoy learning the stuff just as much as they will and enthusiasm is often contagious.
11. What are the negative aspects of homeschooling?
M's answer: For her mother, the negatives were the amount of time it took to organize, the need for time alone, and critics of homeschooling. She didn't see any real negatives from her perspective as a kid. In fact, she mentioned that from time to time her mom would threaten to send them to public schools as a punishment.
My Own Processing: These things are the only downsides that I see at this point. Sure, there will be other things to consider and watch out for. But there are always things to consider and watch out for no matter where the kids go to school. Organization will take a lot of time. I'll probably need to use some preprinted curricula instead of just making it all up (which I would love to do!) just for the sake of time and sanity. Jeff's biggest concern is that the preparation for homeschooling would consume me and take up all my time. I agree that that is something I definitely need to be careful of. Still, I don't think it's enough of a negative to rule out homeschooling. I can see the need to find time away. The nice thing is that we could take a break whenever we needed and pick back up when we were ready. I could get away for a few days and things would still be ok.
I am concerned about critics. I know there will be people that won't like it just because it's weird - and I'll admit homeschooling is not a common choice, but that doesn't make it a bad choice. There will be others who will be genuinely concerned for our kids. I hope that they will do some investigating, read this blog, talk to us, and trust us. We want what's best for our kids. We would never ever do anything to cause them harm and we will not make this decision lightly.
It's so funny that going to public school was such an unwelcome idea for the kids, but it makes sense - homeschool and you can spend a few hours a day in academics, several hours playing, and do it from the comfort of your own home (even in your jammies if you want). You can take random field trips as often as you want. No cafeteria food. No homework. It already sounds like a set up for a pretty good childhood!
Thanks so much, M, for sitting down and talking with us! We greatly appreciate your perspective, help, and support!
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